Who's On The Ledge?

May 18th, 2014

Why can’t I have a whole hour for lunch like Joan does, I say to myself as I rush out the door of the Highmark building and head towards Jefferson Street and my favorite deli. A lousy half hour, that’s all I get.

As I race walk down the sidewalk, my thoughts quickly turn from distress to curiosity. A throng of people are gathered around the old book store. Every single one of them is looking up towards the roof. I know from previous experience that you can’t run and look up at the same time, so I paused to see what the fuss was about. Someone was standing on the upper ledge! 

Nearing the crowd, I heard the crackle static of a two way radio. A man’s voice came over loud and clear: “Jumper has been identified as Maureen Whittier, 2918 W. State Street.”

Mom? I felt the blood drain from my face. My mother is the jumper? This can’t be happening.

Nothing mattered except getting up to that ledge. “Officer, officer. My name is Kelly Whittier. My mother is Maureen Whittier. Please, I have to help her!”

Grabbing my elbow, he led me into the building. “Look, miss, we’ve got a serious situation here. You need to keep a cool head. Don’t do or say anything to upset her. I’ll be right behind you.”

I can’t believe my mother wants to kill herself. Why? I couldn’t come up with a single reason to justify her actions.

As we closed in on her location, something just didn’t feel right. I recognized my mother’s sweater. I know what was off. It was her hair; it didn’t look real. And she looked somehow bigger.

“Mom,” I croaked weakly. As she turned towards me, the initial confusion turned to utter disbelief. This wasn’t my mom. This was my DAD.

“I’m sorry, Kels,” he blurted. “I can’t live a lie any longer. Please forgive me, Kelly dear. Forgive me.”

This was my daddy. The same gut feeling that something wasn’t right took control of me, only this time it told me to act now and speak later. I lunged for him, grabbing his blouse collar, and hauling him backwards off the ledge into safety. Stroking his makeup laden face and holding him tightly, I became the parent and he the child.

“Oh, Daddy, I love you no matter what. We’ll get through this together. You and me. I love you forever, Daddy.”